Vrem...Vrem - Chop...Chop...Whack...Chop...Chop...Whack- Timberrrrrrrr... Crash.... Oops!

It could have been worse, but hardly more memorable.
Xmas Eve and my Brother-In-Law & I decide to chop down a tree. But it wasn't for the sake of our manhoods... rather out of perceived necessity.

You see, I'm in NC. If you have been paying attention, then you knew this already. And if you passed middle school Social Studies, then you can surmise that there are lots of pine trees in NC. Then you can take it one step further and infer that people would be living in close proximity to at least one pine tree.

In this case.... there were 3 in the back yard. One was struck by lightening. Ali, my Brother-in-law, said the tree was dead and had to be cut down. Naturally, me being a wood chopping kind of guy, was all too happy to help. So I go through the list of things we need to do this safely and successfully.

• Chain saw ....................check
• Goggles .........................no...?? Ok then... moving on
• Gloves ..........................no...?? Of course not. What was I thinking? Because I really love bubbles under my epidermis!
• Wedge ..........................check (at least something)
• Rope ............................What... no rope? Am I really surprised?
• Axe ............................ A camp axe...? Are you serious? (sigh)
• Mallet .........................Finally... a manly tool!

Ok then. Lets get started. We plan the demise of the ill-fated, Zeus-targeted pine tree. Yeah, it should fall right about here.

Ali heads to the garage to bring out the chain saw. Now we are in business! I start clearing the yard for the felling path. There's something about cutting wood that makes me feel all manly! (Oh shut-up!)

Ali is on his way back and pulls the chain saw out of the box.... uh.... dude.... "You're kidding, right?" I thought. The first thing I see is a plug. Bad sign. Next emerges the grip and trigger followed by a 16" bar with a dull chain. This ain't a chain saw, man..... its a glorified hedge trimmer! I foresee manual labor.

Ali is rather proud of this chain saw. Ok... if he insists. So he starts cutting into the tree. I whistle trying to stop him. I thought I might tell him to start cutting from the back first so if the tree should fall prematurely, it would fall the way we wanted to. But he was quite into the cutting so I just watched. He worked his way about half way through. He pulled out the saw (if you want to call it that) and started on the angle for the wedge. About a quarter of the way through the chain saw quits. Oh dear... I never saw that coming!

After about an hour of tinkering w/ it, Ali discovered that the teeth (plastic, mind you) were all stripped away from the fly wheel. So the gears (metal) were spinning freely. I was afraid to look to see where the chain saw was made. You're probably thinking it too.

While he was messing with that I proceeded to start cutting with a hand saw. Imaging this for a second.... Ali is a carpenter and didn't even have a reciprocating saw. (well, not available, anyway) Sheesh. And I can really see myself cutting down a 40 foot pine tree w/ a camp axe!
So I used the axe as a wedge and started whacking it with the maul. The axe was fully embedded but the tree wasn't moving.

So Ali starts plans to cut some more wedges so we can hammer them in one at a time and force the tree over. So while he's getting that ready I continue with the hand saw. It was right about this time that the Wind Gods decide to amuse themselves with a little game of Let's see what happens when ....."
Ok, so I'm sawing away and making good progress. I figure the tree will fall after the 1st wedge or two are driven in. But, I was wrong....
The tree started falling before Ali even plugged the saw in to cut out the fargon wedges! Small problem, though..... um.... Ali....

Timberrrrrrrrr......Crash....... Oops!

Ok... it could have been worse. At least it didn't fall on Our house.
Or anyone else's for that matter. But it did take out a fence & crashed about 3 feet short of the neighbors patio. Whew!

Before we even started I told my sister and niece to be recording this on video. This could have been a classic blunder that might have landed us a spot on one of those funny video shows. You Tube for sure!
Of all the wrong ways for this thing to fall, it picked the path of least destruction. Seriously. A couple degrees either way, there would have been more undesirable collateral damage. If my brain would have been running even at half capacity, I would have taken a few pictures. But I didn't even think to. Maybe I can still take a shot tomorrow of the fence and the size of the tree to give you an idea. But the drama will be poorly represented. Oh well. Sorry!

So Ali & I cut the trunk to more manageable sized chunks and cleared the neighbor's yard. He patched the hole in the fence until he can replace the broken part. The fence was ours anyway. The only casualties the neighbor suffered were a couple small branches from one of their trees. Disaster averted!

So it was a mildly eventful Xmas Eve. I hope your Xmas went a little more according to plan!

Be well
... and too all a good night!

Exspectata Hiberna

...which means Welcome Winter in Latin.... in case you're wondering! :-)

And what a welcome it is! December 21st ushered in, not only a new season, but weather befitting the first day of Winter! Yesterday evening my friend & I were hanging out in my patio enjoying a fire. I was wearing a kilt. That's all. Well, until later when it got a little chilly so I donned a hoodie. But still! Of course, yesterday it was still autumn. :-)


But I have more than one reason to commemorate today. I added a new member to my family today. And her name is rather fitting, I should think...


Meet Hiberna:



She (at least I believe its a she) is a California King Snake. She is maybe 3 months old. I have been wanting a King snake for a while now. And no.... it has nothing to do with my teaching at King High School! Although its still kind of funny how this all worked out! I've had Max, my Rat Snake for about 3 years now and Kaa, my Boa for about half that time. And since I've had Max, I've wanted a King Snake. So, there you go!

For those that believe in providence, here is an arguement for you! Here's the brief story....

I am leaving for NC tomorrow. I had some last minute things to wrap up so I had to make a run to Petsmart to get a few things. A snake was not on my shopping list. Out of habit I always make a pit stop at the birds and reptiles to see what they have to offer. I've walked in there for the past few years and never came out with a snake... until today. I guess you could qualify this as an impulse buy, but since I have been waiting for the opportunity for a while, and it came, does that still make it an impulse buy? But that really doesn't matter now anyway. Here's the cool part... I knew that today is the Winter Solstice. But I didn't know exactly at what time. As it turned out it occured at 6:04 PM CST. The time of purchase on my receipt was 5:49PM. So the way I figure it... I made it home in roughly 15 minutes. Ok, maybe I'm stretching a little, but I can't be off more than 3 minutes give or take. Either way... its still pretty damn cool that I walked in the door right around the Solstice with my new little friend.

For once, naming a animal came easily for me.... Hiberna. That's Latin for winter. And it fits. I like it. And in case you are wondering.... yes, that is where we get the term hibernate.

But don't worry, Kaa is the snake boss in the house. Here is a nice recent shot of him.

I don't recall ever telling the story of how Kaa came to me in the first place.

There really isn't much of a story. But its still worth mentioning:

I'm a teacher. And a colleague of mine has a husband who is a herpatologist. Well, he is friends with the Kennel Master (the head guy at the City's Animal Control). Anyway, his department had to confiscate 2 Red Tail Boas. Well, Jaime, the Kennel Master, doesn't like to euthanize animals. So he tries very hard to find homes. Yes, even for large snakes. So that is where I came in. My colleague put me in touch with Jaime and since I was a teacher I could have the snake with the condition that I use it for educational purposes. Which I do. Hence, the relevance of my statement about being a teacher.

Now there were 2 Boas. At the time I was leary about taking both. I had never had a snake that large before. So I just took one. I really didn't like the idea of breaking them up, but I couldn't take the chance that they might be a breeding pair. And with my inexperience with Boas, I thought it best that I took one. Besides, I didn't know how it would go with one, let alone two. Since then I built a nice enclosure that could easily house 2 or even three of them. Now I could handle two. But I wasn't sure at the time. Anyway, as I learned later, Jaime did find another home for the other one. That makes me happy! see --> :-)







If snakes can actually be happy, then I like to think that this guy is.

He's been a real hit at school. He's about 7 and a half feet long now. He eats well and is a good shedder, which is cool because I can take his molting to school.

In my class we have talking about South America, so I'm able to bring a little (well, maybe not so little) piece from that part of the world into the class room.

And so today the Winter Solstice ushered a new era into my home... the era of 3 dogs, a cat, a hermit crab, an aquarium, and now 3 snakes.

Although Hiberna is a mere 17 grams today, she's still a snake. Therefore she still raises the population by one!

So my friends. Say hello to Hiberna. I'll keep you posted!




Be well