Score One for Love

Oh boy... he's talking about love.
That ill defined, yet most desired of (perhaps) all things. I've always believed that love is truly peculiar in that in order to have it, you must give it away. It isn't something you can control. That is where people have so much trouble with it. You can't control it. Don't believe anyone that says they can control their feelings.

So what brought this on? Well, I'll tell ya... another movie. I like movies (can you tell?)
Tonight I watched a pleasantly surprising flick... its a bit older (1999), but its a gem, The Other Sister. I don't know why I didn't hear of this when it was out, but its great. What I like about it is its purity. Its a portrayal of honest to goodness innocent love. Sure, we've all seen romantic comedies and those feel-good-for-now love stories. But this story endures.

The basic premise is a young woman, Carla, played my Juliette Lewis, whose protected upbringing and mental illness have denied her some basic experiences and emotions. Through her tenacity, she explores the one that changes her life... love. The movie doesn't specify on the illness. And that is critical to the story... because it allows for the audience to focus on Carla... not on her illness. The filmakers did a great job in avoiding "labels" for people with MI (Mental Illness).

MI, my friends, is something I can talk about. I spent about 10 years working in the mental health field. I've done everything from mopping the floors in a mental hospital to performing psychological/social assessments and providing preliminary diagnoses. I learned so much from my experience there. One of the things I learned, is that society doesn't want to view people with MI as individuals so much as a walking diagnosis. That is what people do... we put things in categories. The world works better for us that way. We have to put things in a framework for our minds to grasp. We all carry around a box that is comfortable for us to carry. Each person has a unique box. And we have to put the world in this box. But it has to fit. So if something doesn't quite fit, we cram it in any way we can. The problem becomes self evident here... there are always flaws in our box designs, but we would rather stuff everything into our existing box rather than redesign it.
This movie avoids that....thankfully!

Giovanni Ribisi and Juliette Lewis did a good job. I don't want this to be a critique of the movie. This is me telling you folks to watch it if you want to laugh and cry and feel good. Carla's mom is trying to protect her daughter from the hazards of the world, but is learning to respect and appreciate her daughter as an individual. The mother worries about all these things that Carla can't do. But one of my favorite parts in the movie is when Carla tells her mom that she may not be able to play tennis or draw or do any number of things that other people can, but she can love. And she can be loved. Therein lies the heart of this tale.

There is a danger to this film, however. It might lead one to believe that love will conquer all. In truth, it will, but not always the way we hope.

In an effort to avoid a lengthy diatribe, I will just plug in this video montage of The Other Sister.
If you get a chance to love...
We should be so lucky :-)

Be well

Let the Music Move You

My mind has been churning. The last few weeks my thoughts have been so wrapped up in school and getting organized & settled, that my personal musings have been suppressed. But now that I'm starting to fall into (something resembling) a routine, my thoughts have accelerated.

Recently there has been considerable discussion on favorites. Favorite movies, books, characters, teachers, etc... Inevitably the focus becomes favorite music, bands, genre, musicians, etc. This is probably the hardest thing for me to nail down. My mood plays a role in determining what I like at the time. So there is no stand out favorite for me.

Now with books, I can tell you hands down, my all time favorite book (some will be surprised it isn't LOTR) is Watership Down by Richard Adams. I would even put The Hobbit before LOTR, and even The Unlikely Ones by Mary Brown. Women would probably like this more than guys. More about relationships and judgment and less about blood and guts. However, overall I would have to say that LOTR has had the greatest influence on me over the course of my life when taking the books, the movies, and Dungeons & Dragons into account. But I digress.

Back to music.
There are several artists that I have followed consistently over the years. My most enduring favorite would have to be Meat Loaf. Yup. I liked his stuff since I was in Jr. High. We didn't have "Middle Schools". His music, or more precisely, Jim Steinman's music, whose lyrical penning launched Meat Loaf into international fame.
But Meat Loaf's performances are all his. They were a fantastic combination. And over the years they have consistently captured unique perspectives on our lives. And they delivered that perspective with stunning pageantry at times. That is not say that I haven't come to love many others. Its just that Meat Loaf was there at the inception of my appreciation for music. I'm not a big fan of concerts, but I made sure that Meat Loaf was one I attended. And I did. That's a story in itself.

But on to the matter at hand, or what's on my mind, actually. After my last post I have been thinking about what inspires me. Music plays a leading role here too. There are some pieces that just seem to cut right into my soul. Its as though the music and my soul are in harmonious orchestration. Like we're on the same wavelength. I believe some people can tap into that and really feel emotional with certain stimuli.

In fact, I was so determined to study the link between music and emotions that I proposed it for my Masters thesis. But my thesis advisor shot me down saying it was too broad. I'm not saying he was wrong, he wasn't, but I think he should have offered to help me fine tune my query and turn it into something more researchable and testable. But I learned about music over the years. Let me give you an idea of what I was going after. Imagine watching an emotional scene in a movie. Think of one of your favorite tear jerkers for a moment. Now imagine it without the music. I was hoping to identify a causal link. Music plays a huge role in the stories of our lives. You cannot define a culture without it.

So my thoughts turned more directly toward music that inspires me, be it to cry, to laugh, to feel sad, strong, lonely, or happy. So tonight I will share one of my favorite music performances ever. And I caught this by accident when it was live on TV. I recorded it on old fashioned VHS but that has long since gone lost. Thanks to YouTube, I can revisit this performance, and so can you. :-)

I don't recall posting this video yet, but I know it has come up in some of my conversations. This is Milla Jovovich, before anyone knew who she was. I think she was 19 at the time. She was a guest on Conan O'Brian. She was unknown, except I knew of her. ..

A long long time ago there was a music store, when LPs were still being sold routinely (I used to DJ so I went there a lot). Sound Warehouse pioneered the "listen before you buy" approach. That is why I went there. Even though they were about a dollar more than Craigs Record Factory (for those of you that have lived here long enough... hmm I wonder if there is a connection between that and Craig's List now... I wonder). Well, one day Sound Warehouse was featuring a little known artist from the Ukraine. The cover art caught my attention. It has an image that looks like its from Dante's Inferno. The album is called The Divine Comedy. Gee, where have I seen that before. So I picked up the headphones, turned up the volume, and listened in. I really liked it, particularly the song called The Gentleman Who Fell. So I bought the CD. It was like my little secret. As if she was signing just for me.

Lo and behold, who turns up on Late Nite, signing that song, no less! I was stunned and excited and pissed off all at the same time. Damn it! My secret was out. Well, as they say, the rest is history. Now hardly anyone knows that Milla used to sing. Moreover, we didn't even know her last name until The 5th Element. (Except for those of us that bought the CD and read the inserts)

So, after all that, I bring you this soulful performance of Milla singing The Gentleman Who Fell. Let the music move you. Enjoy, my friends!

Be well.